I’m continuing my series using the word THRIVING as an acrostic to describe the elements that help lead us to a thriving life.

TODAY, I’d like to talk what the letter V represents in this acrostic: VICTOR MINDSET

So, have you ever had something bad happen to you?

Maybe you have even been a victim of someone else’s trickery, deception, lies, manipulation, attack, assault, or abuse?

But…

Did you know that there’s a difference between being a victim and embracing what some call a “victim mindset?”

A victim mindset is a frame of mind where a person stays in a perpetual state of victimhood. Which means a person views himself or herself consistently through a lens of being a victim.

How can you diagnose this in yourself or someone else?

Well, do you ever find yourself or someone you know thinking recurrent, frequent thoughts like:

“I can’t believe that event/experience happened to me..poor me!!”

“If only that event/experience never happened to me, then my life would be better.”

“Why did that event/experience happen to me of all people!? What did I do to deserve this?”

“I am this way because it’s all that person’s fault [who hurt me].”

People in a victim mindset constantly complain, whine, pout, and express bitterness and frustration about past events.

Embracing this mindset dis-empowers someone and the longer someone stays in this mindset, the more deeply entrenched this mindset becomes.

And, if this is you, I have no judgment for you! Why? Because I myself have lived in a victim mindset in many areas of my life for years…

But I know from personal experience..it’s no fun..for me or for those around me whom I love!

Now…

What if you could embrace what I call the victor mindset instead?

The victor mindset is the posture of a person where he or she is remembering that while he or she cannot control all aspects of his or her life, he or she ALWAYS has the opportunity to choose how he or she wants to respond to life situations, even bad ones.

You may not be able to control the fact that something outside your control disrupted your day. BUT…you get to choose what you believe and how you want to respond to that unexpected situation.

You may not be able to control the fact that someone abused, rejected, deceived, or hurt you. BUT..you get to choose to acknowledge and accept the feelings that come with this and decide how you want to move forward in a healthy way.

So, what about you?

Do you find yourself embracing more of a victim mindset OR a victor mindset?

Summary:

The victim mindset dis-empowers a person whereas the victor mindset is empowering in that a person is reminding himself or herself that he or she has the power to choose their attitude in any given situation, even a bad one!

PUTTING IT INTO PRACTICE:

Pay attention….if you find yourself or someone you know wallowing in constant self-pity, brooding a lot on negative things in the past, complaining a lot, and staying in a negative energy, ask yourself: are you or this person embracing a victim mindset?

If so, how do you feel being around this person?

And If it happens to be you, what would happen if you started embracing the victor mindset?

Would love to hear how this is going for you..it’s one of my favorite topics :)

Let’s go THRIVE, shall we?

Sean